Quotes on Marriage

See also: D&C 131:1-4; 132:13

“From the moment of birth into mortality to the time we are married in the temple, everything we have in the whole gospel system is to prepare and qualify us to enter that holy order of matrimony which makes us husband and wife in this life and in the world to come. . . .

“There is nothing in this world as important as the creation and perfection of family units” (Bruce R. McConkie, “Salvation Is a Family Affair,” Improvement Era, June 1970, pp. 43-44). — Elder Joe J. Christensen, Ensign, May 1995, p. 64

Each marriage will have its share of buffetings, but there are some basic principles, which, if observed, can help couples stay together and progress toward their celestial potential.

            –  An understanding and appreciation for the power of married love.  God gave to each man and woman powerful emotions that would draw them together and keep them together.  Such love must be nourished and kept fresh and vibrant.  It is strong so that there can be a multiplying and filling of the earth with new life.  It is also given to keep husbands and wives together so they can fulfill each other’s needs and prevent the eye of love from straying to others.

            –  Proper management of finances.  Nothing destroys confidence or credibility in a marriage like profligate spending or unwise management of resources.  Money management must be a shared function and there must be trust and wisdom in using however much or little is available in the marriage.  Payment of tithes and offerings is a must, and is a great safety valve in preventing marital strife over finances.

            –  Appropriate associations with others.  The scriptures make it very clear that husbands and wives are to cleave to each other and “none else.”  Friends, family members, associates at work, fellow participants in recreational pursuits are nice, but should always be secondary to one’s spouse.

            –  Spiritual growth.  Every marriage needs spiritual as well as physical nourishment.  Personal and family prayers, scripture study, regular family home evenings, temple attendance, and service in Church callings are all vital to strong marriages.  When we drift away from spiritual matters we are putting our marriages in jeopardy. — Church News, July 15, 1995, p. 16

Either partner who diminishes the divine role of the other in the presence of the children demeans the budding femininity within the daughters and the emerging manhood of the sons.  I suppose there are always some honest differences between husband and wife, but let them be settled in private. — Elder James E. Faust, Ensign, May 1993, p. 36

The years pass.  The children eventually leave the home, one by one.  And the father and the mother are again alone.  But they have each other to talk with, to depend on, to nurture, to encourage, and to bless.  There comes the autumn of life and a looking back with satisfaction and gladness.  Through all of the years there has been loyalty, one to the other.  There has been deference and courtesy.  Now there is a certain mellowness, a softening, an effect that partakes of a hallowed relationship.  They realize that death may come any time, usually to one first with a separation of a season brief or lengthy.  But they know also that because their companionship was sealed under the authority of the eternal priesthood and they have lived worthy of the blessings, there will be a reunion sweet and certain. — President Gordon B. Hinckley, Ensign, November 1991, p. 52

The home is a reflection of the way a husband treats his wife. — President Spencer W. Kimball

In my judgment the real essence of happiness in marriage lies not so much in romance as in an anxious concern for the comfort and well-being of one’s companion.  Marriage, in its truest sense, is a partnership of equals, with neither exercising dominion over the other, but, rather, with each encouraging and assisting the other in whatever responsibilities and aspirations he or she might have. — President Gordon B. Hinckley, [BYU Fireside, March 1, 1992], The Church News, March 14, 1992, p. 11

Elder [Marvin J.] Ashton [speaking to a group of single adults on August 30, 1992] spoke about the importance of being a quality person, which includes many worthy traits and characteristics such as:

First, to take pride in oneself and take satisfaction in being well-groomed, to work toward high standards and goals to serve others, to practice self-discipline, and to not compromise standards or beliefs.

Second, to have integrity and be worthy of the highest trust.

Third, to not be offended and not be petty.

Fourth, to develop the capacity to love and be lovable.

Fifth, to not murmur, find fault, criticize, belittle or nag.

Sixth, to have real faith.  With true faith we will increase our meaningful relationships with God. — The Church News, September 5, 1992, p. 3-4

We should use the differences between men and women to strengthen marriage.  When we recognize, respect and honor the differences, then we can eliminate the conflict that this can potentially bring into a relationship. — Richard Chidester, BYU Education Week, August 1992

One cannot degrade marriage without tarnishing other words as well, such words as boy, girl, manhood, womanhood, husband, wife, father, mother, baby, children, family, home. — Elder Boyd K. Packer, Ensign, May 1981, p. 14

One good yardstick as to whether a person might be the right one for you is this: in her presence, do you think your noblest thoughts, do you aspire to your finest deeds, do you wish you were better than you are? — President Ezra Taft Benson

The lawful association of the sexes is ordained of God, not only as the sole means of race perpetuation, but of the development of the higher faculties and nobler traits of human nature, which the love-inspired companionship of man and woman alone can insure. — President Joseph F. Smith, Improvement Era, June 1917, p. 739

The girl you marry will take a terrible chance on you.  She will give her all to the young man she marries.  He will largely determine the remainder of her life.  She will even surrender her name to his name.

The obligation [of you young men] begins with absolute loyalty. . . . She will be yours and yours alone, regardless of the circumstances of your lives.  You will be hers and hers alone.  There can be eyes for none other.  There must be absolute loyalty, undeviating loyalty one to another.  Hopefully you will marry her forever, in the House of the Lord, under the authority of the everlasting priesthood.  Through all the days of your lives you must be as true one to another as the polar star. . . .

Your wife will be fortunate indeed if she does not have to go out and compete in the marketplace.  She will be twice blessed if she is able to remain at home while you become the breadwinner of the family. — President Gordon B. Hinckley, Priesthood Session, General Conference, April 4, 1998

“When fretted by this single life which seems to be my lot, I think of all the many men whose wife I’m glad I’m not!” — President James Faust, “A Vision of What We Can Be,” Ensign, March 1996, p. 10

God has appointed marriage, and it is as much a sacred and religious ordinance as baptism for the remission of sins, confirmation, ordination to the ministry or the administration of the sacrament.  There is no distinction with regard to the divinity of these ordinances. . . .

A man who is so foolish as to neglect the divine ordinance of marriage for eternity, here in this world, and does not secure for himself a wife for all eternity will not have the opportunity of doing so in the resurrection; for Jesus says, that after the resurrection there is neither marrying nor giving in marriage.  It is an ordinance that pertains to this world, and here it must be attended to; and parties neglecting it willfully, here in this life, deprive themselves of the blessings of that union forever in the world to come.  (Orson Pratt, JD, XVI, 173, 177.) — Harold Glen Clark, “Priesthood in the Home,” BYU, June 25, 1964, p. 26

When the Lord says all thy heart, it allows for no sharing nor dividing nor depriving.  And, to the woman it is paraphrased: “Thou shalt love thy husband with all thy heart and shalt cleave unto him and none else.”

The words none else eliminate everyone and everything.  The spouse then becomes preeminent in the life of the husband or wife, and neither social life nor occupational life nor political life nor any other interest nor person nor thing shall ever take precedence over the companion spouse.  We sometimes find women who absorb and hover over the children at the expense of the husband, sometimes even estranging them from him.

The Lord says to them:  “Thou shalt cleave unto him and none else.”

Marriage presupposes total allegiance and total fidelity.  Each spouse takes the partner with the understanding that he or she gives totally to the spouse all the heart, strength, loyalty, honor, and affection, with all dignity.  Any divergence is sin; any sharing of the heart is transgression.  As we should have “an eye single to the glory of God,” so should we have an eye, an ear, a heart single to the marriage and the spouse and family.  (Pres. Spencer W. Kimball, Faith Precedes the Miracle, pp. 142-43) Doctrine and Covenants Student Manual, p. 84

The prophets of the past have spoken of those who may not have opportunity to marry in this life.  President Lorenzo Snow said:

“There is no Latter-day Saint who dies after having lived a faithful life who will lose anything because of having failed to do certain things when opportunities were not furnished him or her.  In other words, if a young man or a young woman has no opportunity of getting married, and they live faithful lives up to the time of their death, they will have all the blessings, exaltation, and glory that any man or woman will have who had this opportunity and improved it.  That is sure and positive.”  (The Teachings of Lorenzo Snow, p. 138.) — Church News, September 27, 1997, p. 14

You can trace it all [marriage problems] to selfishness, thinking of oneself instead of one’s companion.  I am satisfied that happiness in marriage is not so much a matter of romance as it is an anxious concern for the comfort and well-being of one’s companion.  Any man who will make his wife’s comfort his first concern will stay in love with her throughout their lives and through the eternity yet to come. — President Gordon B. Hinckley, Anchorage Alaska Regional Conference, June 18, 1995

One comes to realize very soon after marriage that the spouse has weaknesses not previously revealed or discovered.  The virtues which were constantly magnified during courtship now grow relatively smaller, and the weaknesses which seemed to small and insignificant during courtship now grow to sizable proportions.  The hour has come for understanding hearts, for self-appraisal, and for good common sense, reasoning, and planning.  The habits of years now show themselves; the spouse may be stingy or prodigal, lazy or industrious, devout or irreligious; he may be kind and cooperative or petulant and cross, demanding or giving, egotistical or self-effacing.  The in-law problem comes closer into focus, and the relationship of the spouse to hem is again magnified. . . .

. . . the one who marries to give happiness as well as receive it, to give service as well as to receive it, and who looks after the interests of the two and then the family as it comes will have a good chance that the marriage will be a happy one. — President Spencer W. Kimball, “Oneness in Marriage,” Ensign, October 2002, pp. 40-41, 43

You will wish to be married in one place and one place only. That is the house of the Lord. You cannot give to your companion a greater gift than that of marriage in God’s holy house under the protective wing of the sealing covenant of eternal marriage. There is no adequate substitute for it. There should be no other way for you.

Choose carefully and wisely. The girl you marry will be yours forever.  You will love her and she will love you through thick and thin, through sunshine and storm. She will become the mother of your children. — President Gordon B. Hinckley, “Living Worthy of the Girl You Will Someday Marry,” Ensign, May 1998, p. 51

Honorable marriage is more important than wealth, position, and status.  As husband and wife, you can achieve your life’s goals together.  As you sacrifice for each other and your children, the Lord will bless you, and your commitment to the Lord and your service in His kingdom will be enhanced.

Now, brethren, do not expect perfection in your choice of a mate.  Do not be so particular that you overlook her most important qualities of having a strong testimony, living the principles of the gospel, loving home, wanting to be a mother in Zion, and supporting you in your priesthood responsibilities.

Of course, she should be attractive to you, but do not just date one girl after another for the sole pleasure of dating without seeking the Lord’s confirmation in your choice of your eternal companion.

And one good yardstick as to whether a person might be the right one for you is this: in her presence, do you think your noblest thoughts, do you aspire to your finest deeds, do you wish you were better than you are?

God bless you single adult brethren of the Church.  May your priorities be right. –President Ezra Taft Benson, “To the Single Adult Brethren of the Church,” Ensign, May 1988, p. 53

You will need to find your wife or husband.  This will require careful and prayerful consideration.  It would be well to mingle with many good people to have a better understanding of others.  If you desire a fine companion, you should be that kind of fine person for whom that companion would be looking.  Your dating should be on a high and wholesome level.  One of the best yardsticks for knowing whether a certain person may be best for you is to ask yourself what kind of influence this person has on you.  In their presence do you wish you were better than you are?  Do you think some of your noblest thoughts?  Are you encouraged to goodly deeds?  If this is so, that person could be worthy of greater consideration.  But if being in their company makes you tend in the opposite direction, you had best leave them.

Young Women, you are not required to lower your standards to get a husband.  Keep yourselves attractive, maintain high standards, place yourselves in a position to meet worthy men, and be encouraged in constructive work.  Then, if you are married later than sooner – if you even have to wait until the next life to get a choice man – God will make up the difference to you.  Time is numbered only to man.  God has your eternal perspective in mind. — President Ezra Taft Benson, “In His Steps,” 1979 Devotional Speeches of the Year, p. 64

In the Lord’s plan, it takes two – a man and a woman – to form a whole.  Indeed, a husband and wife are not two identical halves, but a wondrous, divinely determined combination of complementary capacities and characteristics.

Marriage allows these different characteristics to come together in oneness – in unity – to bless a husband and wife, their children and grandchildren.  For the greatest happiness and productivity in life, both husband and wife are needed.  Their efforts interlock and are complementary.  Each has individual traits that best fit the role the Lord has defined for happiness as a man or woman.  When used as the Lord intends, those capacities allow a married couple to think, act, and rejoice as one — to face challenges together and overcome them as one, to grow in love and understanding, and through temple ordinances to be bound together as one whole, eternally.  That is the plan. — Elder Richard G. Scott, “The Joy of Living the Great Plan of Happiness,” Ensign, November 1996, p. 74

An understanding of God’s great plan of happiness . . . fortifies our faith in the future.  His plan provides answers to ageless questions:  Are all our sympathies and love for each other only temporary – to be lost in death?  No!  Can family life endure beyond this period of mortal probation?  Yes!  God has revealed the eternal nature of celestial marriage and the family as the source of our greatest joy.

Brethren and sisters, material possessions and honors of the world do not endure. But your union as wife, husband, and family can.  The only duration of family life that satisfies the loftiest longings of the human soul is forever.  No sacrifice is too great to have the blessings of an eternal marriage.  To qualify, one needs only to deny oneself of ungodliness and honor the ordinances of the temple.  By making and keeping sacred temple covenants, we evidence our love for God, for our companion, and our real regard for our posterity – even those yet unborn.  Our family is the focus of our greatest work and joy in this life; so will it be throughout all eternity, when we can “inherit thrones, kingdoms, principalities, . . . powers, dominions, . . . exaltation and glory” (D&C 132:19).

These priceless blessings can be ours if we set our houses in order now and faithfully cling to the gospel. — Elder Russell M. Nelson, “‘Set in Order Thy House,'” Ensign, November 2001, p. 71

I urge each of you young women to get all of the schooling you can get.  You will need it for the world into which you will move….No other generation in all of history has offered women so many opportunities.  Your first objective should be a happy marriage, sealed in the temple of the Lord, and followed by the rearing of a good family.  Education can better equip you for the realization of those ideals.  (Pres. Gordon B. Hinckley, “Stand True and Faithful,” Ensign, May 1996, p. 92) — Quoted by Russell M. Nelson, “Identity, Priority, and Blessings,” Fireside address, September 10, 2000, p. 4

If you are single and haven’t identified a solid prospect for celestial marriage, live for it.  Pray for it.  Expect it in the timetable of the Lord.  Do not compromise your standards in any way that would rule out that blessing on this or the other side of the veil.  The Lord knows the intent of your heart.  His prophets have stated that you will have that blessing as you consistently live to qualify for it.  We do not know whether it will be on this or the other side of the veil.  But live for it.  Pray for it. — Elder Richard G. Scott, Ensign, May 1999, p. 27

God joined Adam and Eve together in marriage before the Fall.  President Joseph Fielding Smith taught: “Marriage as established in the beginning was an eternal covenant.  The first man and the first woman were not married until death should part them, for at that time death had not come into the world.  The ceremony on that occasion was performed by the Eternal Father himself whose work endures forever.  It is the will of the Lord that all marriages should be of like character, and in becoming ‘one flesh’ the man and the woman are to continue in the married status, according to the Lord’s plan, throughout all eternity as well as in this mortal life” (Doctrines of Salvation, 2:71). The Pearl of Great Price Student Manual, p. 11

A man who holds the priesthood accepts his wife as a partner in the leadership of the home and family with full knowledge of and full participation in all decisions relating thereto. . . . The Lord intended that the wife be a helpmeet for man (meet means equal) – that is, a companion equal and necessary in full partnership.”  (President Howard W. Hunter, Conference Report, Oct. 1994; Ensign, Nov. 1994, 50-51) The Pearl of Great Price Student Manual, p. 11

“Through the power of this priesthood which Elijah bestowed, husband and wife may be sealed, or married for eternity; children may be sealed to their parents for eternity; thus the family is made eternal, and death does not separate the members.”  (President Joseph Fielding Smith, Doctrines of Salvation, 2:118)  Blessed with eternal sealings, we can face death as a necessary component of God’s great plan of happiness.  (Alma 42:8) — Elder Russell M. Nelson, “Prepare for Blessings of the Temple,” Ensign, March 2002, p. 22

This perspective gives us strength to endure the trials of life.  President Packer stated, “The ultimate purpose of all we teach is to unite parents and children in faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, that they are happy at home, sealed in an eternal marriage, linked to their generations, and assured of exaltation in the presence of our Heavenly Father.”  (“The Shield of Faith,” Ensign, May 1995, 8) — Elder Russell M. Nelson, “Prepare for Blessings of the Temple,” Ensign, March 2002, p. 22

Marriage and the family unit are the central part of the plan of progression and exaltation.  All things center in and around the family unit in the eternal perspective.  Exaltation consists in the continuation of the family unit in eternity.  Those for whom the family unit continues have eternal life; all others have a lesser degree of salvation in the mansions that are prepared. — Elder Bruce R. McConkie, Doctrinal New Testament Commentary, 1:546

It’s not how much you’re alike, it’s how many differences you can tolerate.  Sometimes we get into Analysis Paralysis in looking at all the ways we’re different and all the reasons we shouldn’t be married.  Lighten up. — Brent Barlow, BYU Education Week, August 2004

“Soul mates” are fiction and an illusion. . . . Almost any good man and woman can have happiness and a successful marriage if both are willing to pay the price.  I do not believe in predestined love.  You must do the choosing rather than to seek for the “one and only” so-called soul mate chosen for you by someone else. — President Kimball, Ensign, March  1977 

There is no other arrangement that meets the divine purposes of the Almighty.  Man and woman are His creations.  Their duality is His design.  Their complementary relationships and functions are fundamental to His purposes.  One is incomplete without the other. . . .

Women are such a necessary part of the plan of happiness which our Heavenly Father has outlined for us.  That plan cannot operate without them. — President Gordon B. Hinckley, “The Women in Our Lives,” Ensign, November 2004, p. 84

“You have always given me wings to fly, and I have loved you for it.” — Marjorie Pay Hinckley

The scriptures remind us that “women have claim on their husbands for their maintenance, until their husbands are taken.”  Women also have a claim on their husbands for respect, fidelity, and thoughtfulness for in that subtle, sweet relationship that should obtain between men and women, there is partnership with the priesthood. — President Spencer W. Kimball, Ensign, May 1978, p. 6

In an explanation of what it means to be sealed by the Holy Spirit of promise, one of our brethren said this:  “While we receive eternal blessings at the hands of the priesthood which has the right to seal on earth and it shall be sealed in the heavens, this revelation clearly states that it must be sealed by the Holy Spirit of promise also.  A man and woman may by fraud and deception obtain admittance to the House of the Lord and may receive the pronouncement of the holy priesthood, giving to them so far as lies in their power these blessings.  We may deceive men but we cannot deceive the Holy Ghost, and our blessings will not be eternal unless they are also sealed by the Holy Spirit of promise. The Holy Ghost is one who reads the thoughts and hearts of men, and gives his sealing approval to the blessings pronounced upon their heads.  Then it is binding, efficacious, and of full force.” — President Harold B. Lee, Improvement Era, December 1970, p.105

Meanwhile, mortal misunderstandings can make mischief in a marriage. In fact, each marriage starts with two built-in handicaps. It involves two imperfect people. Happiness can come to them only through their earnest effort.  Just as harmony comes from an orchestra only when its members make a concerted effort, so harmony in marriage also requires a concerted effort. That effort will succeed if each partner will minimize personal demands and maximize actions of loving selflessness. . . .

Harmony in marriage comes only when one esteems the welfare of his or her spouse among the highest of priorities.  When that really happens, a celestial marriage becomes a reality, bringing great joy in this life and in the life to come. . . .

Celestial marriage is a pivotal part of preparation for eternal life.  It requires one to be married to the right person, in the right place, by the right authority, and to obey that sacred covenant faithfully.  Then one may be assured of exaltation in the celestial kingdom of God. — Elder Russell M. Nelson, “Celestial Marriage,” Ensign, Novermber 2008, p. 94

Marriage was intended by the Lord to endure beyond physical death.  His plan offers eternal perpetuation of the family in the kingdom of God.  His plan provides temples and opportunities to officiate therein for the living and the dead.  A marriage sealed there launches a husband and wife into that grand order of unity so necessary to the perfection of God’s work. — Elder Russell M. Nelson, “Nurturing Marriage,” Ensign May 2006, p. 37

All of this should be conveyed without having priesthood leaders focus upon intimate matters which are a part of husband and wife relationships.  Skillful interviewing and counseling can occur without discussion of clinical details by placing firm responsibility on individual members of the Church to put their lives in order before exercising the privilege of entering a house of the Lord. The First Presidency has interpreted oral sex as constituting an unnatural, impure, or unholy practice.  If a person is engaged in a practice which troubles him enough to ask about it, he should discontinue it. Official Declaration of the First Presidency of the Church, January 5, 1982

We believe that when a man and woman are united as husband and wife, and they love each other, their hearts and feelings are one, that that love is as enduring as eternity itself, and that when death overtakes them it will neither extinguish nor cool that love, but that it will brighten and kindle it to a purer flame, and that it will endure through eternity; and that if we have offspring they will be with us and our mutual associations will be one of the chief joys of the heaven to which we are hastening. . . . God has restored the everlasting priesthood, by which ties can be formed, consecrated and consummated, which shall be as enduring as we ourselves are enduring, that is, as our spiritual nature; and husbands and wives will be united together, and they and their children will dwell and associate together eternally, and this, as I have said, will constitute one of the chief joys of heaven; and we look forward to it with delightful anticipations.  (George Q. Cannon, Journal of Discourses, 14:320–21; see also Notes and Commentary for D&C 22:1; 132:13–18.) Doctrine and Covenants Student Manual, p. 325

Elder M. Russell Ballard said that he has personally received letters posing questions such as, “Why is the Church taking a position on marriage?” and, “It’s someone else’s life; why are we interested in it?” 

“It’s a pretty simple answer,” he responded. “God created this world and He put Adam here and He gave Adam a helpmate whom he called Eve.  They had a charge and a responsibility to multiply and replenish the earth. It is a marvelous and glorious experience to bring forth children and have a family, and that is done between a husband and a wife who are married.

“Marriage is a vital, divine institution defined by God that as a Church also established by divine authority we must defend.” — Elder M. Russell Ballard, “Treasure Truth and Prepare for the Future,” Church News, February 13, 2010, p. 3; from fireside address at BYU-Idaho, January 30, 2010

Let us remember that the first marriage on this earth, that of Adam and Eve, was performed before there was any death in the world; therefore it was intended to be forever. Marriage, if performed by divine authority, is to last forever.

We also read that the Lord declared that it was not good for the man to be alone, therefore Eve was brought upon the scene to be a “help meet for him.”  (See Gen. 2:18.) Thus we see that marriage and the family organization were intended to be forever. — President Joseph Fielding Smith, Conference Report, April 1965

But the Lord very definitely has declared that marriage is an eternal principle.  That is recorded in our scriptures, in the Bible.  I call your attention to the fact that the very first marriage on the face of this earth was performed by the Lord, and it was not for time only because there was no time.  That was declared, and that ceremony given, to a couple who were not subject to death.  Therefore, marriage was not intended to come to an end. — President Joseph Fielding Smith, Conference Report, October 1951

I know it is hard for you young mothers to believe that almost before you can turn around the children will be gone and you will be alone with your husband.  You had better be sure you are developing the kind of love and friendship that will be delightful and enduring.  Let the children learn from your attitude that he is important.  Encourage him. Be kind.  It is a rough world, and he, like everyone else, is fighting to survive.  Be cheerful. Don’t be a whiner. — Marjorie Pay Hinckley

As we got closer to marriage, I felt completely confident that Gordon loved me.  But I also knew somehow that I would never come first with him.  I knew I was going to be second in his life and that the Lord was going to be first.  And that was okay.  It seemed to me that if you understood the gospel and the purpose of our being here, you would want a husband who put the Lord first. — Marjorie Hinckley

I am aware of some young men and women who seemingly have not been successful in total fulfillment.  Some have been on missions; some have completed their education.  And yet they have passed the period of their greatest opportunity for marriage. The time has passed, and while still attractive and desirable and efficient, they find themselves alone.

To you we say this:  You are making a great contribution to the world as you serve your families and the Church and the world.  You must remember that the Lord loves you and the Church loves you.  To you women, we can only say we have no control over the heartbeats or the affections of men, but pray that you may find fulfillment.  And in the meantime, we promise you that insofar as eternity is concerned, no soul will be deprived of rich and high and eternal blessings for anything which that person could not help, that the Lord never fails in his promises, and that every righteous person will receive eventually all to which the person is entitled and which he or she has not forfeited through any fault of his or her own.  We encourage both men and women to keep themselves well-groomed, well-dressed, abreast of the times, attractive mentally, spiritually, physically, and especially morally, and then they can lean heavily upon the Lord’s promises for these heavenly blessings. — President Spencer W. Kimball, “The Importance of Celestial Marriage,” Ensign, October 1979

The LDS Church on Monday reiterated its stance on same-gender marriage, saying the church’s “doctrine on the importance of marriage and family and its implications for same-gender marriage are very clear and are based on principles of truth, respect and love for all of God’s children.”

Earlier Monday, the Human Rights Campaign called President Boyd K. Packer’s Sunday General Conference address “inaccurate.”  The HRC says it is America’s largest civil rights organization working to achieve lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender equality.

The LDS Church’s statement went on to say: “We have continually emphasized that there is no room in this discussion for hatred or mistreatment of anyone.” — “LDS Church Affirms Stance on Marriage,” Deseret News, October 5, 2010

The day is coming soon when no one will need to die without a temple marriage . . . The day will come when there will hundreds of temples all over the world, when there will not be one soul in the world, probably, who is more than a thousand miles away; and for a one-time experience in all one’s life, a thousand miles is not far to go.  It wouldn’t be far to crawl if one knew what he was getting and what he was missing if he didn’t go. — President Spencer W. Kimball, “Marriage is Honorable,” BYU Speeches, 1973, p. 269

Under the plan of heaven, the husband and the wife walk side by side as companions, neither one ahead of the other, but a daughter of God and a son of God walking side by side.  Let your families be families of love and peace and happiness. Gather your children around you and have your family home evenings, teach your children the ways of the Lord, read to them from the scriptures, and let them come to know the great truths of the eternal gospel as set forth in these words of the Almighty. — “Selections from Addresses of President Gordon B. Hinckley,” Ensign, March 2001, p. 64

Be careful, O ye mothers in Israel, and do not teach your daughters in future, as many of them have been taught, to marry out of Israel.  Woe to you who do it; you will lose your crowns as sure as God lives. Discourses of Brigham Young, 196

But the whole subject of the marriage relation is not in my reach, nor in any other man’s reach on this earth.  It is without beginning of days or end of years; it is a hard matter to reach.  We can tell some things with regard to it; it lays the foundation for worlds, for angels, and for the Gods; for intelligent beings to be crowned with glory, immortality, and eternal lives.  In fact, it is the thread which runs from the beginning to the end of the holy Gospel of Salvation – of the Gospel of the Son of God; it is from eternity to eternity. — Brigham Young, Journal of Discourses, 2:90

Grateful should we be for a knowledge of the eternity of the marriage covenants. . . . The assurance that our relationship here . . . as husbands and wives will continue in heaven, and that this is but the beginning of a great and glorious kingdom that our Father has destined we shall inherit on the other side, fills us with hope and joy. One of the greatest evidences to me of the divinity of this work is that it teaches there is eternal life on the other side, and that there will be a reunion there of the loved ones who have known each other here. . . . if we and they are faithful. The Teachings of George Albert Smith, p. 110

Many of the TV screen shows and stories of fiction end with marriage: “They lived happily ever after.” . . . We have come to realize also that the mere performance of a ceremony does not bring happiness and a successful marriage.  Happiness does not come by pressing a button, as does the electric light; happiness is a state of mind and comes from within.  It must be earned.  It cannot be purchased with money; it cannot be taken for nothing. 

Some think of happiness as a glamorous life of ease, luxury, and constant thrills; but true marriage is based on a happiness which is more than that, one which comes from giving, serving, sharing, sacrificing, and selflessness. — President Spencer W. Kimball, “Marriage and Divorce,” BYU Devotional, September 7, 1976

Clearly, right marriage begins with right dating.  A person generally marries someone from among those with whom he . . . socializes.  Therefore, this warning comes with great emphasis.  Do not take the chance of dating nonmembers, or members who are untrained and faithless.  A girl may say, “Oh, I do not intend to marry this person.  It is just a ‘fun’ date.”  But one cannot afford to take a chance on falling in love with someone who may never accept the gospel.  True, a small percentage have finally been baptized after marrying Church members. . . . They are our blessed minority. . . . But the majority did not join the Church and . . . friction, frustration and divorce marked a great many of their marriages. — President Spencer W. Kimball, The Miracle of Forgiveness, pp. 241–42

To help our youth abide by the principles involved in temple marriage, we must help them to understand that temple marriage is more than just a place where the ceremony occurs; it is a whole orientation to life and marriage and home.  It is a culmination of building attitudes toward the Church, chastity, and about our personal relationship with God – and many other things.

Thus, simply preaching temple marriage is not enough.  Our family home evenings, seminaries, institutes, and auxiliaries must build toward this goal, not by exhortation alone but by showing that the beliefs and attitudes involved in temple marriage are those which can bring the kind of life here and in eternity that most humans really want for themselves. The Teachings of Harold B. Lee, p. 244

I could wish nothing better for each of you, my dear young friends, than love – the companionship of one dearer than any friend; someone to be deliriously excited over and to be happy with; someone to stir within you the very best that is there; someone to grow more appreciative of, more tender toward, more grateful for, more a part of as one year becomes another and life moves toward eternity.  May the Lord answer your prayers with love, the kind that will always express itself in concern not for self but for your beloved companion. — President Gordon B. Hinckley, “And the Greatest of these is Love,” BYU Devotional, February 14, 1978

I have a word to say to my sisters. When I reflect upon the duties and responsibilities devolving upon our mothers and sisters, and the influence they wield, I look upon them as the mainspring and soul of our being here.  It is true that man is first.  Father Adam was placed here as king of the earth, to bring it into subjection.  But when Mother Eve came she had a splendid influence over him.  A great many have thought it was not very good; I think it was excellent. Discourses of Brigham Young, p. 199

I have learned that happy marriages rely on the gift of repentance.  It is an essential element in every good marital relationship. Spouses who regularly conduct honest self-examination and promptly take needed steps to repent and improve experience a healing balm in their marriages. Repentance helps restore and maintain harmony and peace.

Humility is the essence of repentance.  Humility is selfless, not selfish.  It doesn’t demand its own way or speak with moral superiority.  Instead, humility answers softly and listens kindly for understanding, not vindication.  Humility recognizes that no one can change someone else, but with faith, effort, and the help of God, we can undergo our own mighty change of heart.  (See Alma 5:11-12, 26-31.)  Experiencing the mighty change of heart causes us to treat others, especially our spouses, with meekness.  (See Moroni 7:43-48; 8:25-26)  Humility means that both husbands and wives seek to bless, help, and lift each other, putting the other first in every decision. Watch and learn: repentance and humility build happy marriages.

I have observed that in wonderful, happy marriages, husbands and wives treat each other as equal partners.  Practices from any place or any time in which husbands have dominated wives or treated them in any way as second-class partners in marriage are not in keeping with divine law and should be replaced by correct principles and patterns of behavior. — Elder L. Whitney Clayton, “Marriage: Watch and Learn,” Ensign, May 2013, p. 84

I have learned that the real essence of happiness in marriage lies not so much in romance as in an anxious concern for the comfort and well-being of one’s companion. Thinking of self alone and of the gratification of personal desires will build neither trust, love, nor happiness.  Only when there is unselfishness will love, with its concomitant qualities, flourish and blossom.

Marriage, in its truest sense, is a partnership of equals, with neither exercising dominion over the other, but, rather, with each encouraging and assisting the other in whatever responsibilities and aspirations he or she might have. — President Gordon B. Hinckley, “I Believe,” Ensign, August 1992